If you guessed we're moving, you're right. But wait, there's more...
If you guessed Captain is getting another sibling... you are ALSO right! Sadly for a Vizsla blog, though, this is not the canine kind of sibling... I am pregnant again! I wish I could write something as heartfelt and thorough about all the things I am feeling this time as I did my first time around- but I'm JUST. TOO. TIRED. It's by sheer feeling of obligation I'm even getting this much out.
So. On to the details. This isn't some little 3-10 mile away move like we've been doing over the past eight years, hopping around the Bay Area (oh how nice that has been!) Nope. We are heading alllllllll the way to the East coast. Philly, to be exact. Before I lose all the followers I have gained over the past nearly eight years (because California is so dang beautiful and you're only here for the scenic pics) - I promise there are some pretty spots on the East coast too. (That's what I have to keep telling myself, anyway.... it is SO HARD to leave this golden land we call Cali.)
It was an incredibly hard decision we made to move back East. I grew up out there, but eight years in California has nearly turned me fully West coast. It was odd, though- the Christmas before last, I was home in Baltimore, for the first time with my daughter for the holidays- and all my family around me- and there was just this extremely intense pull home. More then ever in my life, I felt the need to be close to family so that I could share my daughter with them, and have her share her life with them. At the same time, a job opened up that was just in every way possible the perfect fit for me, a total career advancement, and with a boss I've looked up to my whole career and who is just frickin awesome. Not thinking I'd get it, I applied, but with this dream in my head - family, a house, a rockstar job, my daughter getting to experience all the best memories I knew about growing up on the East coast. Raking piles of leaves and jumping in them, waking up to snow outside your window and coming inside to hot chocolate after an afternoon of sledding; the feeling when it's just spring and you finally get to wear your short-sleeves again, or seeing fireflies at night after a hot summer day. SEASONS, smells.... a full palette of colors (and temperatures) right outside your window.
When I got the job, I don't think I slept for two straight weeks trying to make the decision- worried it would ruin my husband's career, or that my daughter would hate me for pulling her away from California, and yes, even that I would make Captain - my Cali beach boy- unhappy and deprive him of outdoor adventures he loved. But at the same time, the job was too good to turn down, and the words of one of my friend's kept ringing in my head: "This is your ticket home." We were stymied by the choice (I like to refer to my mental state of indecision and anxiety during that time as like the poison scene from the Princess Bride), but, eventually, I made the choice and decided to jump. Choose adventure, choose the challenge, choose.... going home.
I've been blessed over the past year to have negotiated the first year of my contract working remotely- helping my husband's job situation, and at the same time, making a slow goodbye to California. These past few days, I've felt a new anxiety- I didn't see enough, do enough, soak it all in enough. I started to feel like I did when we first moved out here, like it was all new and I needed to go EXPLORE as much as possible. But, of course, there's never enough time to do it all. I feel like we've been incredibly lucky to have lived in such a beautiful part of the world for eight years, to have gotten to do all the weekend trips and see the sights we have. For those we've missed, I'm told California will still be here to visit... and who knows, maybe we'll be back to live here one day.
It is always bittersweet to end something in life, but it's a beginning too. Speaking of beginnings... my OTHER big news...
Captain is getting ANOTHER little sister! I found out I was preggo literally the day before we went house hunting in Philly- which changed just about every aspect of our search. I am SO excited for my daughter to have a sibling, and completely bewildered as to how I will pull it all off. (My husband will be traveling every month back and forth to his job in Cali, at least for a while). And, I am worried that Captain will get neglected. And further annoyed by these little rugrats who chase him around and grab him and yell for him....but I like to think he is the begrudging older brother who only pretends to be annoyed but secretly loves it. The dog-child interaction is so, so sweet, and I couldn't be happier to have a dog like Captain for my children (!! EEK! I will have CHILDREN! Another one! Yes, that's setting in) to grow up with.
So, stay tuned for more adventures, just on a different coast. Oh - and speaking of that- when I took the job, I got all excited about driving across country with Captain, taking him to all the amazing National Parks and spots along the way, and blogging as we went. Then, we went to Sequoia - a four hour drive- for the weekend - with my daughter in the back seat, alternating between screaming and crying at the top of her lungs, and asking "Where are we going?" repeatedly, incessantly, without regard for our answering the same thing every minute. Um, yeah. Picture-perfect x-country drive out the window. So, my husband and Captain will be doing the drive (I could never put Captain on a plane!) while my daughter and I will be flying. I'm bummed to miss the adventure... but happy to miss the crying ;)
Catch you on the other coast!